What the hell was I thinking?

It is day 23 of my current 40-day round of HCG protocol with 17 more to go.  Last time, by day 20 I'd dropped 21 pounds and was pissed I had been talked out of a 40-day cycle because I could have kept going and lost another 20 pounds.  Everyone said it was "too hard" to stick with it for that long and yet it had been a breeze for me with seriously amazing results.  Where am I this time around, you ask?  Well, I'm not down 21 pounds, I'll tell ya that! 

I've lost a total of 16.4 lbs and am on this insane new trend of only losing weight every other day for the last eight days.  Last time it was so easy to stay motivated because I was seeing .8 lbs or more melt away every day.  EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.  The meal protocol is so strict and specific and rigid and unforgiving but so very worth it when you see impossible results day after day.  What happens to your mental stamina when you don't see those results every day is bad.  Very bad.  In the last three days I've contemplated quiting at 23 days, been tempted to cheat - something I was never even tempted with last time around, cursed myself for thinking 40-days would be easy, wanted to throw my scale out the plate glass window, and everything in between.  The last week has been rough... no, more like brutal.  I even choked down an apple on Friday to give myself some variety in my fruit since there are only four to choose from and I won't eat grapefruit.  Ugh, I hate apples!

Today, I decided to really evaluate what I've been doing to see if there are perhaps subtle things that could be contributing to the trend. . . and thereby reverse it.  I am a problem-solver by nature, after all.  So, starting today, I am vowing to walk every single day, I'm not eating beef anymore since I ate none of it last round (Hubby will be happy because he just inherited a shit-ton of beef I stocked up on at the local Sam's Club) and I'm not chewing gum anymore since I didn't last time.  Hopefully the remaining 17 days will go much smoother and yield me at least 17 mores pounds of weight gone forever before I go on maintenance.  And if they don't... well, that nuclear meltdown you hear about on the news next week is probably me!

On a positive note... I'm down 16.4 lbs - IN THREE WEEKS - my clothes keep getting looser,  and I look better than I have since before I had my first baby.  Yes, I just bitched for three paragraphs about the slowness of the process this time around but I must not lost sight of how phenomenal the results are regardless of how much I wish they were even better.  HCG is a miracle - one I'm so glad I stumbled upon!  When they say it is a weight loss cure, they aren't lying...