What an amazing weekend... What an endurance test... What an accomplishment...
WE DID IT!! Our entire team finished the 191 grueling miles together and had the experience of a lifetime. I'm still all jumbled up in my thoughts and trying to wrap my mind around how to relay everything that transpired effectively. How do you explain to people how spending thirty eight hours in a car together, with five other stinky runners, driving slowly across half the state can be fun? But oh my god was it ever fun!!
I made a list of things to do differently next time (yes, there's definitely going to be a next time!)
1) take a backpack, not your purse, Terra *sheesh*
2) pack even lighter - I didn't use half the stuff I brought because my bag was buried in the back the whole time. Which will also be solved with a backpack to put my essentials in and have handy.
3) we need a unique lighting option to differentiate OUR runners at night, even in Van 1
4) we don't need as much food next time
5) don't do three graveyard on-call shifts the week leading up to Ragnar
The week leading up to the race I was a total stress ball but when it came to actual race day I was relaxed and ready to experience Ragnar. Thursday was filled with last minute preparations - like getting the house restocked with groceries so my poor kids who were staying home with the nanny for the weekend could eat. Everyone in my van, "Van One", met at my house that evening to drive the two hours to Logan where the race started. We met the one person none of us knew at the hotel when we checked in and headed for the restaurant for dinner. We picked an Italian place so we could all "carb-load". Kind of a joke among runners to eat a big meal the night before when in reality, if you were really carb-loading the correct way, it happens over a couple of weeks and is way intense. By the time we got done with dinner and back to the hotel to hit the sack it was after eleven o'clock PM. With our start time of six-thirty the next morning we decided we needed to rendezvous around the coffee pot in the lobby by four-forty five. Considering I was the first runner, I can't run on an empty stomach AND I can't run on a full stomach I had to be up at about three-forty five to eat my meal replacement, get dressed and repacked and ready to head out. Yikes, that is NOT a lot of sleep and it was going to bite me in the ass later considering I'd worked the graveyard on-call shift the two nights in a row previous and had gotten very little sleep.
The weather gods were smiling down on me personally when the morning brought almost freezing temperatures. It's no secret that I hate the heat and my favorite temperature to run in is forty. Being the first runner out of the gate and it being under forty when we headed out from the hotel brought me such joy. We made our way - after my sister and I reloaded the car while everyone else sipped coffee - to the start where we had to stand in line to check in to get our race bibs... Then another line to get our safety flags... Then another line to get our safety briefing done... No wonder they tell you to arrive an hour and a half before your scheduled start time! Luckily there was a huge merchandise tent that was warm. I'm sure it was on purpose since it was a superb marketing ploy.
Then they were calling the runners for the 6:30 start time to line up. The start was on the Utah State University campus track and then out the stadium from there to wind our way through quaint farming communities and over three mountain passes toward our finish line. About fifty teams start together so the track was full but not overflowing. Teams start all day in order to keep the course manageable with the fourteen THOUSAND runners who participated. I was so nervous and so excited standing there among all the other runners doing the "runner one" spot. When they said "GO" we all took off and for once I didn't sprint off the start but stuck to my pace. Which also meant by the time we came to the first corner to put us out onto the roads of Logan I was well in last place. The motto is: "further, not faster" and I kept telling myself that it didn't matter how fast I went just as long as I could go the distance. Especially since I had the longest total mileage of anyone on the team. The morning was so beautiful and I had such an amazing run those first seven miles. My van-mates, led my my sister the best driver on the planet, stopped every couple of miles to make sure I didn't need anything and to give me more cow bells. (If you haven't seen the SNL skit about more cow bells you must google it and watch it!)
One of the funnest parts of running Ragnar is watching all the crazy vans drive by and seeing how they have been decorated with team names and themes. I realized that we were in serious need of van decorating since ours had none at that point. We didn't want to get up earlier or stay up later to do it and figured we'd have plenty of time during the race. Not only are the van decorations and sayings painted on the windows entertaining to see, it makes your van more distinguishable among the hundreds that pass by on each leg. So, note to self: must get at least our team name on the windows after I'm done running. Luckily we'd tracked down some car markers the night before.
Only one thing marred that first run and it was a personal annoyance that plagued me the entire race... being road kill. Some hard core Ragnar runners have started the tradition of counting their kills through the race. In Ragnar-speak a roadkill is when you pass up another runner. I'm sure if you're the one doing the passing and there are very few people to count it is fun and exhilarating. When you are the slowest runner on that leg and EVERYONE passes you and says "good job" as they run by it feels more demeaning than encouraging. I was thankful to those who passed by me in silence and stayed out of my head remembering that I was only responsible for running my pace on my legs, not anyone else's, and we'd still finish on time. We were in it to Finish, not in it to win it after all. I ran the seven miles in exactly the time I estimated it would take me for my average 10K pace and felt amazing. That was the leg I had been most worried about since it included a lot of rolling hills. I like it flat and downhill, I'm not gonna lie!
At the end of my run I handed off to my sexy husband who was waiting at the exchange and he headed out on his first leg of six miles. He killed everyone who had just killed me AND got his picture taken by a photographer for one of the local papers which was featured on their website the next day. He ran so fast that by the time I'd cooled down and we loaded into the van to leap-frog ahead of him and be ready with water, he'd passed the point he told us he'd want us at. So, we just kept driving until we found him and pulled over to give him some water. Not too shabby for a guy who had his ACL replaced two and a half years ago and did very little training for the actual running part of Ragnar.
We repeated the cool-down-the-incoming-runner-and-leapfrog-ahead-to-support-the-current-runner dance through the other four runners in the van. It was so interesting to watch how each person's demeanor would change as they became the runner on deck and would start their own mental preparations. Some would get quiet, some would get giddy and some just didn't sweat it but strapped on their bib number and was ready to go. Steven called himself the grumpy runner because he doesn't actually love the running part of running. He retreated into his headphones in search of his zen place and ran very focused, not needing much support from us in the van at all. Jaclyn we soon found was our secret weapon and could run so fast. She was almost all done with her first run before we even caught up with her. Sean had a tough climb up Avon pass but enjoyed it so much he was posing for pictures as we passed him by. Jose screamed downhill on the other side of the pass and also posed for pictures - road killing along the way.
We arrived at the first major exchange in Eden about one o'clock PM to find massive amounts of team vans. A major exchange is where both vans from your team - and every other team - are there together because one van is handing off to the other van. You can imagine the chaos! We were parked in some poor farmer's field who I am personally grateful is someone who supports Ragnar and let us be there. We split up with half of us heading for the lines to use the Honey Buckets (aka, road construction porta-potty) and the rest searching for Van Two before they headed out to support Nancy as she took the exchange from Jose. By some miracle we were parked in the same general area as them and saw them as they were heading out. We passed on the other half of the cowbells, gushed about how much fun we were having and wished them as much luck on their legs.
With the baton now with Van Two, we had about five hours of down time before we had to be at the next major exchange and ready for our next set of runs. We hung out there for a bit to see what booths they had and what free food there was, which was not much since they had chips and salsa but had run out of salsa. The free samples of frozen yogurt were a hit and the jewelry that enticed me turned out to be kind of cheesy and overpriced. So, we all stood in line for the Honey Buckets - something that became one of the main activities of the weekend as Steven pointed out - and then headed back to the car. We took the time then to put our team name "Run, Piggies, Run" on the back window of the Excursion and put each runner's name on the side windows with three check-boxes to mark our progress along the way. Van decorating complete, we headed for Snow Basin to wait for Van Two to get done and pass the baton back to us.
*** I've decided to publish the race recap in three parts or else it will be ages before anyone hears how it all went! Stay tuned for the next installment that will cover the second leg of our journey! ***
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Ragnar Recap - Pre Race
What the hell is Ragnar? I realized that just because people have been hearing me talk (and blog and tweet and Facebook) about Ragnar for a year that doesn't mean people know what it is or what I am about to embark on. In a nutshell, it is a relay race from Logan to Park City, UT: one hundred ninety one miles, run by twelve runners over a forty eight hour period. The twelve runners are split into two vans and each runner runs three different times. Each leg of the relay is assigned so if I'm runner one (which I just so happen to be), I run legs one, thirteen and twenty five. The motto of the race is: Run, Drive, Sleep, Repeat. The original race of the Ragnar Relay Series is the Wasatch Back here in Utah but they have them all over the country now. So you know it has to be fun, right?
It's amazing to me that Ragnar is actually here. I started talking about doing a Ragnar Relay years ago. The first year, I wasn't ready as a runner to even run the distance of one of the legs but it sounded so fun I said "next year" and vowed to train hard. Then I got pregnant and missed the next year. The following year I didn't think I'd have enough time to recover from childbirth and train for Ragnar in five months so I said "next year" yet again.
"Next year" arrived last summer - the summer of 2010. My adorable running fool of a cousin starts talking about Ragnar at the yearly family reunion every summer because she has just finished a few months before. Last year was only different in one way: I was finally capable (and ready and willing) to join in the fun. So we decided to get a team together. Between the two of us we were sure we could find ten other runners if each of us focused on filling a van with our fellow running buddies. Since both of our husbands are also runners, that left only four people for each of us to find and get committed. Registration is in August so we had a couple of months.
Early August arrived and I had my runners but she had complications - namely of the conflict variety. See, she's done this several years and is a very strong runner having done a full marathon last year. There was a team at her work and they really wanted her - and they had a lot of money and sponsors which we wouldn't have which I admit would have been super enticing for me. She also did not want to be a team captain - adamantly did not want to be the captain. I assured her I didn't feel bad that she wanted to join the team at work with all her friends (and sponsors!) and said I'd just get my own team together.
I should have listened to her vehement objection to being the captain but what did I know then?
So, I talked to everyone I know and all of their friends and put together a team of twelve committed runners who had paid me their portion of the team registration and even got in before the early registration (aka discount period) was over. Two days before regular registration even began, our team "Run Piggies Run" had a team number and a spot in the Wasatch Back 2011. They allow 1050 teams and we were team number 1048. Yes, you read that correctly. The race sold out two days before early registration was over. It got me all excited that we got in and I started planning and thinking about logistics.
And then the one person who hadn't paid me but assured me they would backed out and I was already trying to find someone else to take their place. Luckily, one of my running friend's team from the previous year didn't get registered in time so she was available and filled the spot quickly. That was the beginning of a string of substitutions that resulted in five of the twelve original team members replaced since then. We had one drop out due to injury, one got a super exciting internship for the summer in D.C., one had a conflict with scouting and one had a sister who got married and had the nerve to schedule her wedding on Ragnar weekend. Oh, and my friend who ran last year who's team didn't get in? They registered wait list and got in a few weeks ago. Luckily I have three neighbors I successfully talked into joining the insanity and my good friend Diyeana talked her sister in law and new boss into last minute substitutions. The craziest part for me is that I have still not even met two of my teammates - one of which will be in my van for a thirty six hour stinkfest.
Since August I have exercised my project management skills so much that I should have been getting paid to do it. Twelve adults who live all over the place with crazy schedules were assembled for planning meetings twice and every logistical possibility planned for. Countless emails were exchanged keeping us all on the same page and preparing all of us for our very first Ragnar (with the exception of one who did Ragnar Vegas last October and who I couldn't have done it without.) All this while I was doing all the other insane things I always do AND running twenty miles a week on average for the past twenty weeks. And all of the planning and training culminates tomorrow as we embark on our Ragnar journey.
On top of all our team logistics we've had record late snowfall in Utah and it was only today, two days before race day, that we got the official word that the roads on the two passes through the mountains had been cleared of snow and would be drivable. As much stress as I've had coordinating my little team of twelve could you imagine having to work out logistics for the entire race? Think about it - one thousand fifty teams of twelve runners and you're talking over twelve thousand runners. Hubby and I drove parts of the course over Memorial Day and if nothing else I'm looking forward to running through some beautiful country. Thank god we didn't have to add more mileage to anyone's runs to go around the mountain passes that were still closed due to snow!
We leave tomorrow evening to drive the two hours to where the race starts to hopefully get some sleep at a hotel so we can be at the starting line by 5:00AM on Friday morning. I'm the first runner out of the gate at 6:30 AM with a 6.9 mile run. Approximately twelve hours later, I have my second run of 8.3 miles down one of the canyon passes. My third run is my "easy" one at just over 4 miles of mostly flat terrain. My total mileage is twenty miles in thirty six hours. Still sounds daunting even to me when I add the miles together but I've been training hard and I know I can do them split up into the three different runs with no sweat.
Did you hear me just now sounding all positive and shit? I hope you bought it because really I'm scared shitless that I'll have to walk that last four miles or that I'll get so stiff riding around in the van that I won't be able to run either of the subsequent runs. But, I'm not letting myself stress about it because regardless of how it happens I am excited to experience it and have a blast. I even talked my sister into being our support driver and I'm really looking forward to spending the time with her - although I don't think she's quite as excited to endure what can only be termed a sweaty stink-fest. When one of the top things on any list of what to bring is a towel to sit on "so the stink doesn't go into the seats" followed closely with the tip to pack your clothes in large Ziploc bags so you can "zip up the stink" you have to expect the worst, right?
I'm heading off to bed now... wish me luck and watch my tweets for updates along the way. Of course I'll recap post-race as well - if I live through it, that is!
It's amazing to me that Ragnar is actually here. I started talking about doing a Ragnar Relay years ago. The first year, I wasn't ready as a runner to even run the distance of one of the legs but it sounded so fun I said "next year" and vowed to train hard. Then I got pregnant and missed the next year. The following year I didn't think I'd have enough time to recover from childbirth and train for Ragnar in five months so I said "next year" yet again.
"Next year" arrived last summer - the summer of 2010. My adorable running fool of a cousin starts talking about Ragnar at the yearly family reunion every summer because she has just finished a few months before. Last year was only different in one way: I was finally capable (and ready and willing) to join in the fun. So we decided to get a team together. Between the two of us we were sure we could find ten other runners if each of us focused on filling a van with our fellow running buddies. Since both of our husbands are also runners, that left only four people for each of us to find and get committed. Registration is in August so we had a couple of months.
Early August arrived and I had my runners but she had complications - namely of the conflict variety. See, she's done this several years and is a very strong runner having done a full marathon last year. There was a team at her work and they really wanted her - and they had a lot of money and sponsors which we wouldn't have which I admit would have been super enticing for me. She also did not want to be a team captain - adamantly did not want to be the captain. I assured her I didn't feel bad that she wanted to join the team at work with all her friends (and sponsors!) and said I'd just get my own team together.
I should have listened to her vehement objection to being the captain but what did I know then?
So, I talked to everyone I know and all of their friends and put together a team of twelve committed runners who had paid me their portion of the team registration and even got in before the early registration (aka discount period) was over. Two days before regular registration even began, our team "Run Piggies Run" had a team number and a spot in the Wasatch Back 2011. They allow 1050 teams and we were team number 1048. Yes, you read that correctly. The race sold out two days before early registration was over. It got me all excited that we got in and I started planning and thinking about logistics.
And then the one person who hadn't paid me but assured me they would backed out and I was already trying to find someone else to take their place. Luckily, one of my running friend's team from the previous year didn't get registered in time so she was available and filled the spot quickly. That was the beginning of a string of substitutions that resulted in five of the twelve original team members replaced since then. We had one drop out due to injury, one got a super exciting internship for the summer in D.C., one had a conflict with scouting and one had a sister who got married and had the nerve to schedule her wedding on Ragnar weekend. Oh, and my friend who ran last year who's team didn't get in? They registered wait list and got in a few weeks ago. Luckily I have three neighbors I successfully talked into joining the insanity and my good friend Diyeana talked her sister in law and new boss into last minute substitutions. The craziest part for me is that I have still not even met two of my teammates - one of which will be in my van for a thirty six hour stinkfest.
Since August I have exercised my project management skills so much that I should have been getting paid to do it. Twelve adults who live all over the place with crazy schedules were assembled for planning meetings twice and every logistical possibility planned for. Countless emails were exchanged keeping us all on the same page and preparing all of us for our very first Ragnar (with the exception of one who did Ragnar Vegas last October and who I couldn't have done it without.) All this while I was doing all the other insane things I always do AND running twenty miles a week on average for the past twenty weeks. And all of the planning and training culminates tomorrow as we embark on our Ragnar journey.
On top of all our team logistics we've had record late snowfall in Utah and it was only today, two days before race day, that we got the official word that the roads on the two passes through the mountains had been cleared of snow and would be drivable. As much stress as I've had coordinating my little team of twelve could you imagine having to work out logistics for the entire race? Think about it - one thousand fifty teams of twelve runners and you're talking over twelve thousand runners. Hubby and I drove parts of the course over Memorial Day and if nothing else I'm looking forward to running through some beautiful country. Thank god we didn't have to add more mileage to anyone's runs to go around the mountain passes that were still closed due to snow!
We leave tomorrow evening to drive the two hours to where the race starts to hopefully get some sleep at a hotel so we can be at the starting line by 5:00AM on Friday morning. I'm the first runner out of the gate at 6:30 AM with a 6.9 mile run. Approximately twelve hours later, I have my second run of 8.3 miles down one of the canyon passes. My third run is my "easy" one at just over 4 miles of mostly flat terrain. My total mileage is twenty miles in thirty six hours. Still sounds daunting even to me when I add the miles together but I've been training hard and I know I can do them split up into the three different runs with no sweat.
Did you hear me just now sounding all positive and shit? I hope you bought it because really I'm scared shitless that I'll have to walk that last four miles or that I'll get so stiff riding around in the van that I won't be able to run either of the subsequent runs. But, I'm not letting myself stress about it because regardless of how it happens I am excited to experience it and have a blast. I even talked my sister into being our support driver and I'm really looking forward to spending the time with her - although I don't think she's quite as excited to endure what can only be termed a sweaty stink-fest. When one of the top things on any list of what to bring is a towel to sit on "so the stink doesn't go into the seats" followed closely with the tip to pack your clothes in large Ziploc bags so you can "zip up the stink" you have to expect the worst, right?
I'm heading off to bed now... wish me luck and watch my tweets for updates along the way. Of course I'll recap post-race as well - if I live through it, that is!
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Screw that, I've got feathers in my hair!
Okay, I'm officially done with my little meltdown. Seriously, last week had me on the edge more times than I've been in... well, I don't ever remember being that close that often before. I'm always a little psychotic around a new moon but this one was a doozie and will go down in the history books, I'm afraid. I'll look back years from now and say "wow, remember the new moon of May 2011? What a killer!" I have now effectively slapped myself back to kickin' ass and takin' names mode and am ready to tackle the mountain of laundry I've let pile up and get back to writing, which I've been slacking on.
Speaking of writing...My writer's group IS AMAZING and helped immensely getting me out of the slump. We met last week which was fabulous as always. I got to play with character development through dialogue which I didn't realize I could do until I tried. And, we ended the evening with a brainstorm session on my novel. I came away with lots of the fuzzy ideas I've had swarming around in my head a bit more solidified AND on paper. But, it also resulted in many a daunting realization for me. Like am I really changing the name of my female main character? (If you have any powerful sounding female names, please share them since she can no longer have the same name as Baby Sister!) And am I really thinking of putting a religious aspect into my book? (Yes, ME, the non-religious girl with religion in her book!) And is my male main character going to fundamentally have to change everything he's been doing in the beginning of the story? I know all three of these things mean a much more challenging story to write but I'm excited about the possibilities and the depth they will bring to my little baby. I can't wait to be able to carve out consistent time again to write. Which I will do once the insanity that is Ragnar is over in just over a week. I've come to accept that there is no way to do both Ragnar training AND writing at the same time and I just have to be okay with not doing everything all the time when I bite off this much to chew on.
Sigh. Sometimes being an overachiever really bites.
With that said, my running lately has been a joke and I'm worried that I should be more stressed about it. I haven't run more than four or five miles in weeks because of time constraints with the hubby's new schedule cutting into my gym time. And, since I'm being honest, I haven't even been that motivated to push myself to the level of training I know I need to be at in order to be successful on this race. Like Sunday night I totally could have done a second run in the evening but I just didn't want to get off the couch. And I didn't. If I'm rationalizing, which I've been doing a lot of the last couple of weeks, it's because I've been suffering with a flare up of my old nemesis running injury, plantar fasciitis, and I don't want to push myself hard and then not be able to even run on race weekend. Then there's the run I tried in the eighty two degree heat of a June Sunday in Utah that sapped my energy so much that I couldn't even run more than thirty minutes before I thought I'd die - LITERALLY. Have I mentioned how much I loathe heat? I long for the cool temperatures of fall already and it isn't even full-blown summer yet. I'm probably the only person I know who trains outdoors all winter and opts for the treadmill in the summer. But I digress...
Today I got some good news coupled with a dose of reality. I stumbled across an article talking about the need for rest and how some runners have a tendency to overlook it. Turns out that being stressed and tired and all the things I've been suffering the last few weeks takes a toll on a runner's performance and the only cure is to take some time to rest so your body has time to recover. So, the new plan is to not stress about how much training I'm going to get, or not get, in the next week. Seriously, I've been training hard core for 18 weeks and it's time to start tapering off so I am rested and ready for race day. I'll go for a few light runs between now and then but not push myself. I know that I am indeed capable of running morning and night and the next morning - because I've done it already - and that I can run the distances I have on tap for each of my legs of the relay - seven miles, eight miles and four miles respectively. It feels good being back in the mind frame of "I'm ready" instead of the stressed out "OMG I'M NOT GOING TO BE READY" I've been feeling. On the way home from work today I saw a bumper sticker that said "FURTHER... NOT FASTER" and I laughed right out loud because it was clearly on the back of that Jeep just for me to see and be reminded that for me it isn't about speed but endurance. I need to turn off the pace calculator on the old Garmin and things might be a bit less stressful for myself. When did I become so obsessed with being competitive anyway?
I also had an epiphany the other day when the date of my first race of the running season came and went and I didn't even register or pretend to care that I was missing it. Once Ragnar is over, I'm going to go back to running for the joy of running and not care about a race until the half marathon in October. By then it will be cooler temperatures and I can train hard for a few months and be happy. After the insanity of Ragnar training it will be nice to take a break, enjoy running again, and have time to write.
To go along with my new outlook, I indulged a whim and got feather extensions in my hair at the gym last weekend with Big Sister. It's fabulous and sassy and represents everything I'm feeling now where nothing is going to get me! So, the only question is, did the feathers come because of the new outlook or did my outlook change because I got feathers in my hair? At this point, I'm so glad to be out from under the dark cloud of ick that I don't care how it happened, I'm just glad it did! Here's to the downhill fun of this roller coaster I call life!
Speaking of writing...My writer's group IS AMAZING and helped immensely getting me out of the slump. We met last week which was fabulous as always. I got to play with character development through dialogue which I didn't realize I could do until I tried. And, we ended the evening with a brainstorm session on my novel. I came away with lots of the fuzzy ideas I've had swarming around in my head a bit more solidified AND on paper. But, it also resulted in many a daunting realization for me. Like am I really changing the name of my female main character? (If you have any powerful sounding female names, please share them since she can no longer have the same name as Baby Sister!) And am I really thinking of putting a religious aspect into my book? (Yes, ME, the non-religious girl with religion in her book!) And is my male main character going to fundamentally have to change everything he's been doing in the beginning of the story? I know all three of these things mean a much more challenging story to write but I'm excited about the possibilities and the depth they will bring to my little baby. I can't wait to be able to carve out consistent time again to write. Which I will do once the insanity that is Ragnar is over in just over a week. I've come to accept that there is no way to do both Ragnar training AND writing at the same time and I just have to be okay with not doing everything all the time when I bite off this much to chew on.
Sigh. Sometimes being an overachiever really bites.
With that said, my running lately has been a joke and I'm worried that I should be more stressed about it. I haven't run more than four or five miles in weeks because of time constraints with the hubby's new schedule cutting into my gym time. And, since I'm being honest, I haven't even been that motivated to push myself to the level of training I know I need to be at in order to be successful on this race. Like Sunday night I totally could have done a second run in the evening but I just didn't want to get off the couch. And I didn't. If I'm rationalizing, which I've been doing a lot of the last couple of weeks, it's because I've been suffering with a flare up of my old nemesis running injury, plantar fasciitis, and I don't want to push myself hard and then not be able to even run on race weekend. Then there's the run I tried in the eighty two degree heat of a June Sunday in Utah that sapped my energy so much that I couldn't even run more than thirty minutes before I thought I'd die - LITERALLY. Have I mentioned how much I loathe heat? I long for the cool temperatures of fall already and it isn't even full-blown summer yet. I'm probably the only person I know who trains outdoors all winter and opts for the treadmill in the summer. But I digress...
Today I got some good news coupled with a dose of reality. I stumbled across an article talking about the need for rest and how some runners have a tendency to overlook it. Turns out that being stressed and tired and all the things I've been suffering the last few weeks takes a toll on a runner's performance and the only cure is to take some time to rest so your body has time to recover. So, the new plan is to not stress about how much training I'm going to get, or not get, in the next week. Seriously, I've been training hard core for 18 weeks and it's time to start tapering off so I am rested and ready for race day. I'll go for a few light runs between now and then but not push myself. I know that I am indeed capable of running morning and night and the next morning - because I've done it already - and that I can run the distances I have on tap for each of my legs of the relay - seven miles, eight miles and four miles respectively. It feels good being back in the mind frame of "I'm ready" instead of the stressed out "OMG I'M NOT GOING TO BE READY" I've been feeling. On the way home from work today I saw a bumper sticker that said "FURTHER... NOT FASTER" and I laughed right out loud because it was clearly on the back of that Jeep just for me to see and be reminded that for me it isn't about speed but endurance. I need to turn off the pace calculator on the old Garmin and things might be a bit less stressful for myself. When did I become so obsessed with being competitive anyway?
I also had an epiphany the other day when the date of my first race of the running season came and went and I didn't even register or pretend to care that I was missing it. Once Ragnar is over, I'm going to go back to running for the joy of running and not care about a race until the half marathon in October. By then it will be cooler temperatures and I can train hard for a few months and be happy. After the insanity of Ragnar training it will be nice to take a break, enjoy running again, and have time to write.
To go along with my new outlook, I indulged a whim and got feather extensions in my hair at the gym last weekend with Big Sister. It's fabulous and sassy and represents everything I'm feeling now where nothing is going to get me! So, the only question is, did the feathers come because of the new outlook or did my outlook change because I got feathers in my hair? At this point, I'm so glad to be out from under the dark cloud of ick that I don't care how it happened, I'm just glad it did! Here's to the downhill fun of this roller coaster I call life!
Thursday, May 26, 2011
All I get are book reviews? What is happening!
I've been so busy I somehow forgot I'm a blogger. I may have forgotten I'm a writer for a little bit, too. Right now all I am is a mom and a runner... And I'm not even doing either of those very well.
Wow, doesn't that sound like a pity party? If I were one of you, my faithful if anonymous followers, I might shake my head and mutter about the downer and stop reading. But, guess what - life is as full of downers as it is uppers. And I'm not talking about little pills either. So, instead of suffering alone, I'm sharing with the world - my small corner of it anyway - and hoping somehow it is the key to turning it all around and getting me out of the current slump.
It isn't even a slump really. I'm just overwhelmed with my life. It happens. Occasionally.
Hubby isn't happy with his job. I'm not happy with my job. Big Sister is, I'm hoping, a typical nine year old who would rather lolly-gag and watch TV than pick up after herself regardless of how often I yell at her and ground her and take away her phone. Little Sister is in the full blown "terrible two's" and is constantly throwing tantrums and screaming when she doesn't get her way. Hubby's work schedule - at the job he hates - has begun interfering with everything from co-parenting to my running and we barely get to see each other. I have the equivalent of a part time job on top of my regular full-time day job in required after-hours support. And, I haven't written a thing in weeks - unless you count a couple of book reviews. Oh, and I am so busy both at work and at home that it's been days since I got to talk to my friend who abandoned me at work and who I miss desperately. You know, now that I think about it this can all be blamed on her - since she left there is no one around who lets me vent and keeps me sane. Great.
So, that's my life in a nutshell.
Plus, I'm freaking out about Ragnar because I've been so crazy busy the last two weeks that I haven't gotten to run regularly and now we only have about three weeks of training time left before the big show. Oh, and did I mention that we've had to replace five of the twelve team members in the last few weeks? Yeah, try finding runners insane enough to even consider doing this relay race who aren't already on a team and who are willing to jump in with only a few weeks left to train. It is pretty difficult. Luckily I know a lot of people but we've pushed the limit on scraping the barrel so hopefully it is over.
Oh, and did I mention that I need to have my wisdom teeth removed? Yeah, I'm thirty nine and I still have my wisdom teeth - don't judge. And the recovery time is going to either interfere with Ragnar OR trump our trip back to Glacier we had planned... Do you see why I'm a wreck these days?
I do have stolen moments here and there like glimmers of light to cling to in the darkness and keep me going. Book club last week was amazing and the brief brainstorming session with a fellow writer afterward may have finally gotten me past the little block I had going with moving forward on my novel. Although I haven't had a chance to write, I'm constantly thinking about the characters and the story line and wondering where it is going to take me. Dance season is over so I'll get a month off from the shuttling back and forth three nights a week and school is out next week so my mornings will get less intense.
So, if you find yourself wondering where I've been and why all I've been posting are a few book reviews, picture me screaming through life with a toddler on my leg and my hair on fire juggling more than my usual share. And with this picture in your mind, I hope you'll forgive me...
Wow, doesn't that sound like a pity party? If I were one of you, my faithful if anonymous followers, I might shake my head and mutter about the downer and stop reading. But, guess what - life is as full of downers as it is uppers. And I'm not talking about little pills either. So, instead of suffering alone, I'm sharing with the world - my small corner of it anyway - and hoping somehow it is the key to turning it all around and getting me out of the current slump.
It isn't even a slump really. I'm just overwhelmed with my life. It happens. Occasionally.
Hubby isn't happy with his job. I'm not happy with my job. Big Sister is, I'm hoping, a typical nine year old who would rather lolly-gag and watch TV than pick up after herself regardless of how often I yell at her and ground her and take away her phone. Little Sister is in the full blown "terrible two's" and is constantly throwing tantrums and screaming when she doesn't get her way. Hubby's work schedule - at the job he hates - has begun interfering with everything from co-parenting to my running and we barely get to see each other. I have the equivalent of a part time job on top of my regular full-time day job in required after-hours support. And, I haven't written a thing in weeks - unless you count a couple of book reviews. Oh, and I am so busy both at work and at home that it's been days since I got to talk to my friend who abandoned me at work and who I miss desperately. You know, now that I think about it this can all be blamed on her - since she left there is no one around who lets me vent and keeps me sane. Great.
So, that's my life in a nutshell.
Plus, I'm freaking out about Ragnar because I've been so crazy busy the last two weeks that I haven't gotten to run regularly and now we only have about three weeks of training time left before the big show. Oh, and did I mention that we've had to replace five of the twelve team members in the last few weeks? Yeah, try finding runners insane enough to even consider doing this relay race who aren't already on a team and who are willing to jump in with only a few weeks left to train. It is pretty difficult. Luckily I know a lot of people but we've pushed the limit on scraping the barrel so hopefully it is over.
Oh, and did I mention that I need to have my wisdom teeth removed? Yeah, I'm thirty nine and I still have my wisdom teeth - don't judge. And the recovery time is going to either interfere with Ragnar OR trump our trip back to Glacier we had planned... Do you see why I'm a wreck these days?
I do have stolen moments here and there like glimmers of light to cling to in the darkness and keep me going. Book club last week was amazing and the brief brainstorming session with a fellow writer afterward may have finally gotten me past the little block I had going with moving forward on my novel. Although I haven't had a chance to write, I'm constantly thinking about the characters and the story line and wondering where it is going to take me. Dance season is over so I'll get a month off from the shuttling back and forth three nights a week and school is out next week so my mornings will get less intense.
So, if you find yourself wondering where I've been and why all I've been posting are a few book reviews, picture me screaming through life with a toddler on my leg and my hair on fire juggling more than my usual share. And with this picture in your mind, I hope you'll forgive me...
Monday, May 23, 2011
Five Quarters of the Orange, by Joanne Harris
This was a book club pick about a girl growing up in occupied France during WWII. She returns to her childhood home as a widow hoping no one will recognize her as the young girl who's name she no longer uses because of the scandal that occurred with her Mother. It's been a week since I finished reading AND participated in the book club discussion and I still don't know exactly how I feel about this book... I really liked the story but there was so much anticipation and suspense built up around this big secret the main character had kept hidden forever that when I finally learned the truth it was almost a let-down. I read this book (vs. listening to it) and I found all the french in it distracting. I feel like I missed whole pieces of the book between not knowing all the food references and then not being able to interpret the sections in french or even know what some of the names of the characters should sound like in my head. That alone was enough to knock this book from four stars down to three. However, if you're looking for a book that keeps you guessing until the end with interesting characters this is still a book I would recommend for a quick and light read.
One thing I really liked was how the author showed us things that done by an adult would be appalling but when done by a nine year old child seemed almost harmless. And the added layer of character development getting to see the same child grow to adulthood and look back on the role she may have played in her own Mother's actions was fabulous. I loved the book club discussion and took away may other insights I hadn't come up with on my own - as always!
One thing I really liked was how the author showed us things that done by an adult would be appalling but when done by a nine year old child seemed almost harmless. And the added layer of character development getting to see the same child grow to adulthood and look back on the role she may have played in her own Mother's actions was fabulous. I loved the book club discussion and took away may other insights I hadn't come up with on my own - as always!
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
I Don't Want To Kill You
I looked forward to this, the newest book from Dan Wells, with great anticipation. And while it was an enjoyable read, sadly it wasn't as good as the first two. I felt that the main character was too different in this third and final book and I wanted him to be the same dark and terrifying teen we had glimpsed and gotten intimate with in the first two. The story and the twists and turns it took were very interesting and exciting enough to keep me reading but the character of John and the inconsistencies left me wanting. What happened to the guy who obsessed so much about killing that he had to resort to starting fires in Mr. Monster with all his rules to keep him from behaving like the sociopath he really is? He's completely gone and if you hadn't read the first two books you could almost miss the fact that he IS a killer, not just some good guy who has to do bad things occasionally to save the people in his community. Most of the time he comes across as just an awkward teen, barely noticing that he's gotten himself a girlfriend, rather than the chillingly creepy sociopath walking a thin line and fighting his inner demons constantly. It was clumsy character development at best. While the story came to an exciting conclusion with more action and more demons, I just didn't feel emotionally attached anymore to the main character so it left me feeling flat. I wanted to love this book and while I still will highly recommend the series, this was not my favorite installment.
I'm really so sad... but can't wait to discuss it with all my reading and writing buddies who have been waiting somewhat impatiently for me to "get done with it already!" Kudos to all of them who kept their opinions to themselves and let me read with unbiased eyes - I don't know if I could have done the same for them!
I'm really so sad... but can't wait to discuss it with all my reading and writing buddies who have been waiting somewhat impatiently for me to "get done with it already!" Kudos to all of them who kept their opinions to themselves and let me read with unbiased eyes - I don't know if I could have done the same for them!
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Don't forget the sun on your shoulders
Gadget geek checking in with news of her latest acquisition: I'm SO excited that I have a GPS for running. Even cooler is the resourcefulness I exhibited (usually Hubby's forte) in obtaining it FOR FREE because the guy selling the older model his wife never used couldn't find the charger and thus it is pretty worthless to either of us. Apparently it was easier to just let me take it off his hands than to throw it out himself once we realized it was missing. Thank you, Amazon seller who still had an old style charger, and $25 later I have a Garmin!! For those unversed in the runner gear world, that equates to about a $250 savings. So you can see why I'm so excited....
Okay, all gushing aside at the coolest thing since my Nike+ for a moment so I can update you on the insanity that I call Ragnar training...
First, I am totally behind. And I mean seriously behind. Like I should have run a sixteen mile run last weekend and I logged a mere five mile limp-fest instead. The reality of trying to run long distances even once a week with two kids and a husband, who I would really like to stay married to and see frequently, doesn't exist in my universe. So, I'm doing the best I can and hoping that my training approach will be just as good as the one on the website assuming their training program is only one way of preparing. Sort of like how speed limit signs are merely a suggestion when I'm driving. It's possible. My approach is this: Instead of stressing about my total distance of twenty one miles - yes, that's five miles shy of a FULL marathon - and thinking I need to be able to run that in one long run, I'm focusing on mimicking the act of running my specific legs of the relay in relatively close intervals. Which means my "every day" run in the middle of the week needs to be about eight miles and I need to do two of those about twelve hours apart then throw in another four mile run twelve hours after that. Sounds do-able, right? I am capable of running eight miles at a time already, it's just the challenge of finding the two hours to do it amongst the chaos of the rest of my life. If only I didn't have to work all day... think of all the training I could get done!
Then there's the limp-fest I mentioned. The last few weeks I've totally been babying my stupid knees that are fine when I'm not running and then are excruciating daggers of pain with every step while running. This is nothing new if you've been following my training this year but even when I've been diligently icing and resting and not trying to increase my mileage too fast it has still been a problem, like last week. I started my hill training and I wondered if it was because I was using different muscles - I KNOW I was using different muscles in my ass because for a few days after the first hill run I could barely sit without pain, but that's another story. So I searched all the runner websites and all the blogs and I found a few references about re-training your gait in order to prevent recurring injuries. The theory is that it is because of the bio-mechanics of your stride and gait that you have the pain that you do and if you change the way you run you can prevent the pain and injuries. What the hell, after starting out last Sunday for an eleven mile planned run feeling awesome and then having to WALK most of the way until I called for a pickup, I was willing to try anything! Three runs later - one on the treadmill and two outdoor - I am happy to report that it seems to be working. I have even minimized my old nemesis plantar fasciitis while I was at it and I haven't needed to ice my knee for a week. The secret? Realigning my pelvis so it isn't tilted and engaging my core muscles differently plus making sure my feet are equal distance apart with my knees pointing straight ahead. Sounds so easy, right?
Which brings us back to the joy and agony of my new Garmin GPS. Remember, I am a numbers and data kind of girl who tracks every run and what my pace is and all the other stats with my Nike+. But, as my distances have increased I have noticed more and more of a discrepancy between what my mapping software says the run is and what my Nike+ says I've run when it is all said and done. Which is probably the real reason I searched long enough to find the replacement charger if I'm being honest. I was excited to have a GPS accuracy for my pace and distance tracking but also a bit nervous about what I might find out. My first outdoor run was canceled due to weather - I had cool weather gear packed but wasn't equipped for sub-freezing temperatures in the last week of April. When I finally did get a chance to use it I was running an uphill route. The data was discouraging but hey, it was UPHILL. So I did a downhill run just to be sure of the accuracy AND wore both gadgets to compare them real time. Picture it: left arm strapped with my Garmin which is the size of a small cell phone. My right arm has both my heart rate monitor and my Nike+ band which is only slightly smaller than a regular watch. I looked like Madonna in the 80's with her bracelets to her elbows. What I found is that I was right - the Nike+ was off in both distance and pace calculations. I ran 3.05 miles by the GPS but Nike+ said 3.48. I ran a pace of 14:30/mile by the GPS but the Nike+ said I was a 13:30/mile. Considering the Ragnar start time and logistics live and die by the average pace of the team, to know I was a minute slower per mile was disheartening to say the least. Plus the realization that my long runs have been about a mile shorter than what I thought which means now I'm even more behind in my training... It was another low point for me.
But, as I ran with my heart in my chest, the self-doubt thoughts swirling in my head, the strong and chilly headwind whistling past my ears and the obsessing about running the right way marching like a cadence to the sound of my feet hitting the pavement, I felt the sun warm on my shoulders. And for just a minute I remembered that none of that other shit matters. What matters is how I feel when I run - the freedom, the joy, the exhilaration. JUST RUN! My pace is what my pace is no matter how badly I want it to be faster but it doesn't matter - because running is an individual sport and all I have to do is better than I did the last time and I win. And the more I run the faster I'll get.
Okay, all gushing aside at the coolest thing since my Nike+ for a moment so I can update you on the insanity that I call Ragnar training...
First, I am totally behind. And I mean seriously behind. Like I should have run a sixteen mile run last weekend and I logged a mere five mile limp-fest instead. The reality of trying to run long distances even once a week with two kids and a husband, who I would really like to stay married to and see frequently, doesn't exist in my universe. So, I'm doing the best I can and hoping that my training approach will be just as good as the one on the website assuming their training program is only one way of preparing. Sort of like how speed limit signs are merely a suggestion when I'm driving. It's possible. My approach is this: Instead of stressing about my total distance of twenty one miles - yes, that's five miles shy of a FULL marathon - and thinking I need to be able to run that in one long run, I'm focusing on mimicking the act of running my specific legs of the relay in relatively close intervals. Which means my "every day" run in the middle of the week needs to be about eight miles and I need to do two of those about twelve hours apart then throw in another four mile run twelve hours after that. Sounds do-able, right? I am capable of running eight miles at a time already, it's just the challenge of finding the two hours to do it amongst the chaos of the rest of my life. If only I didn't have to work all day... think of all the training I could get done!
Then there's the limp-fest I mentioned. The last few weeks I've totally been babying my stupid knees that are fine when I'm not running and then are excruciating daggers of pain with every step while running. This is nothing new if you've been following my training this year but even when I've been diligently icing and resting and not trying to increase my mileage too fast it has still been a problem, like last week. I started my hill training and I wondered if it was because I was using different muscles - I KNOW I was using different muscles in my ass because for a few days after the first hill run I could barely sit without pain, but that's another story. So I searched all the runner websites and all the blogs and I found a few references about re-training your gait in order to prevent recurring injuries. The theory is that it is because of the bio-mechanics of your stride and gait that you have the pain that you do and if you change the way you run you can prevent the pain and injuries. What the hell, after starting out last Sunday for an eleven mile planned run feeling awesome and then having to WALK most of the way until I called for a pickup, I was willing to try anything! Three runs later - one on the treadmill and two outdoor - I am happy to report that it seems to be working. I have even minimized my old nemesis plantar fasciitis while I was at it and I haven't needed to ice my knee for a week. The secret? Realigning my pelvis so it isn't tilted and engaging my core muscles differently plus making sure my feet are equal distance apart with my knees pointing straight ahead. Sounds so easy, right?
Which brings us back to the joy and agony of my new Garmin GPS. Remember, I am a numbers and data kind of girl who tracks every run and what my pace is and all the other stats with my Nike+. But, as my distances have increased I have noticed more and more of a discrepancy between what my mapping software says the run is and what my Nike+ says I've run when it is all said and done. Which is probably the real reason I searched long enough to find the replacement charger if I'm being honest. I was excited to have a GPS accuracy for my pace and distance tracking but also a bit nervous about what I might find out. My first outdoor run was canceled due to weather - I had cool weather gear packed but wasn't equipped for sub-freezing temperatures in the last week of April. When I finally did get a chance to use it I was running an uphill route. The data was discouraging but hey, it was UPHILL. So I did a downhill run just to be sure of the accuracy AND wore both gadgets to compare them real time. Picture it: left arm strapped with my Garmin which is the size of a small cell phone. My right arm has both my heart rate monitor and my Nike+ band which is only slightly smaller than a regular watch. I looked like Madonna in the 80's with her bracelets to her elbows. What I found is that I was right - the Nike+ was off in both distance and pace calculations. I ran 3.05 miles by the GPS but Nike+ said 3.48. I ran a pace of 14:30/mile by the GPS but the Nike+ said I was a 13:30/mile. Considering the Ragnar start time and logistics live and die by the average pace of the team, to know I was a minute slower per mile was disheartening to say the least. Plus the realization that my long runs have been about a mile shorter than what I thought which means now I'm even more behind in my training... It was another low point for me.
But, as I ran with my heart in my chest, the self-doubt thoughts swirling in my head, the strong and chilly headwind whistling past my ears and the obsessing about running the right way marching like a cadence to the sound of my feet hitting the pavement, I felt the sun warm on my shoulders. And for just a minute I remembered that none of that other shit matters. What matters is how I feel when I run - the freedom, the joy, the exhilaration. JUST RUN! My pace is what my pace is no matter how badly I want it to be faster but it doesn't matter - because running is an individual sport and all I have to do is better than I did the last time and I win. And the more I run the faster I'll get.
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