The evolution of November

December is here and with it came the end of this year's NaNoWriMo. So many things have changed for me this year. The drastic shift started back in February when I decided to start actively pursuing this insanity called publication. So I shouldn't be surprised that NaNoWriMo and the part it plays in my writing has also changed. This year I'm not working on a new story, I'm revising an old one so I can sell it soon. That's the plan anyway. Even knowing that's where I'm at, I still feel guilty that I didn't "win" this year. That's how much a part of me this silly thing I do every November has become.

What did I do in November INSTEAD of finishing NaNo? Lots of things...

I'm working with some amazing authors to create a non-profit organization for writers with a community and collaborative focus rather than book sales. A professional organization for writers like no one has ever created before that gives back to members at all levels as well as the public at large. It's super fun but part of me wonders why I gravitate to being in charge of things rather than just being a participant. Not in my nature apparently. It doesn't feel like work, but if you add up all the time I have put into it, I've done quite a lot the last month toward this collective vision that we hope will be amazing.

I submitted a short story to a very prestigious writing contest for as-yet unpublished authors. Wait, I know I've been hinting at publication news for a while now but I still don't have a signed contract to purchase my story. It is slotted for a short-story collection due out next year but until the deal is done and signed I'm not talking about it as a past-tense reality. Doesn't mean I'm not super excited about it, I just don't want to jinx it. Yes, deep down I'm a neurotic writer. See? This contest comes with cash prizes for the winners and some pretty impressive writing credentials if I'm a finalist - including publication. But I won't know until months from now. And we all know how impatient I am. Luckily I have things to take my mind off the waiting. This was one of my specific goals for this year so checking it off my list was a pretty significant milestone for me.

Because I do have a pending deal, I must have a "real" website with a URL that doesn't include "blogspot" or any of the other free sites. In other words, I have to get legit. So in all my free time (ha!) I'm building a website to migrate my blog to. Don't worry, you'll be able to follow me when I go and, if everything works out the way I hope, all my past content will come with me. We'll see when I get to that point. Building websites is not a job I want - full time or part time. It kind of sucks. I'm really good at what I know and having to start over with an associated learning curve is frustrating.

Because I have to get legit, I had to get professional head-shots taken so I can use them everywhere people expect. Prompted by a deadline for said pending publication deal, I had to get them done ASAP. Imagine my horror when I found out you can't use your smartphone to take a selfie and use that. I was a photographer in a past life before I started writing and I'm better behind the camera than in front of it. However, I'm pretty happy with how they turned out. It helps to have a long-standing relationship with a photographer you trust... Voila! Big hair to match my big personality.

Hubby said the other day, when I was apologizing for all the time I've spent away from normal family life lately, that it was to be expected since "writing isn't a hobby anymore". Imagine that. My hobby isn't a hobby anymore, it's a business that will someday pay off. I have no delusions of ever replacing the lucrative income from my corporate job but you never know. Stranger things have happened.

I let a beta reader take a gander at my story that's getting ready for public appearance. She immediately started drilling me about the world I'd built and characters I'd created that had already become real to her. She needed answers and she needed them now. Guess I better get cracking on THAT novel soon, too.There are now more stories and novels in the pipeline than I ever thought possible.

When I look back at where NaNoWriMo has taken me, I'm okay with my Novembers evolving into something different. Maybe next year I'll be in the first draft arena of another story so I can participate. If not, at least I'll still be writing!

Why you can't "do" NaNoWriMo if you are revising - my latest epiphany

Remember when I said I wasn't going to do NaNoWriMo this year? And then I decided I was a big fat liar since I was going to do it but bend the rules and not write something new? I'm here to tell you it wasn't a good idea. When I'm drafting a brand new story, I can bust out a couple of thousand words a day and finish while still having a life - or whatever my life usually resembles. Revisions are not the same as vomiting a story from your subconscious with the motto running through your head of "Write First, Ask Questions Later".

I've written consistently this month - six days a week with the exception of the two days I was too sick to stay awake that long. But I only have 20,000 words to show for it. So what the hell is happening?

Revisions are FAR different from first drafts. I delete more words than I write because I'm focused on quality rather than sheer quantity. I'm trying to write coherent scenes that tie together and take my characters from where they are to where I know they are headed. The place they must be headed if the story is to remain consistent. And entertaining. And marketable. And entertaining. You get the point. So while I've been consistent, I'm only averaging about eight hundred words a day.

I started out the week feeling dejected as I saw everyone I know near the finish line. I felt stressed that the goal of "winning" with 50,000 words was slipping further and further from my grasp as this week continues with more of the same productivity. But then I remembered that my personal goal this year is very different. I'm still on track for that goal which is the only thing that's important.

I will "win" when I finish this revision by the end of December. Oh, and submit a short story to a writing contest. Because why not? I've had the idea knocking around in the back of my mind and recent events make it possible to do it without treading into murky "it can't be published yet" waters. (First rule of publishing: release deadlines never stick!)

It is uncharted territory I'm exploring. The path to figuring out exactly how to write a novel was long and fraught with hardship. Now I'm on what I've declared as the path to getting published. I fear it will be just as difficult and just as fraught with obstacles. But damn it's exciting to be here!

Halfway there check-in

What is it with November? Do I get sick every year coincidentally or is it a side-effect of NaNoWriMo? It is week three and I'm behind because week two - the dreaded week two - had me sick and unmotivated. Week one went splendidly and I was on track for the minimum recommended word count. Week two, I penned in the couple of hundred of words a day range instead of the thousands that I needed - if I wrote at all. Now I'm thousands of words behind.

I could wallow but the real goal is to revise this novel so I'm focusing on the fact that I've written seventeen thousand words toward that. I'm still plugging along and loving this revision process. I know exactly what the ending looks like, and exactly what I need to be writing toward from the beginning. I know what needs to be foreshadowed, and what motivates my characters. Most of them, anyway. About half of what I've written is brand new stuff because I added supernatural elements and changed the story in fundamental ways. It's been fun, even if it's been exhausting. I could definitely get used to this revision thing thanks to having a fabulous developmental editor I can employ as soon as the first draft is written.

See you on the flip side of November... win or lose I'm sure to be sleep deprived and highly caffeinated but loving every minute.

Embarking on Revisions - and why I'm a big fat liar

Game on for NaNoWriMo 2014! Wait, what? I know. Right now you think my addiction is showing and pray that I get some help after my confession just ten short days ago. But let me explain...

When I set out last year to write my second novel, I swore it would be the one that I figured out the fearful and overwhelming process of Revisions with. All of 2014 so far has been devoted to just that. What I didn't know, is that after I employed the services of a developmental editor it would be necessary to re-write basically every scene. Every. Single. One. Oh, and add in more of course and layer in more elements that are still missing.

My editor is phenomenal. Sometimes I hate what she tells me but it is always spot on. Seriously, if you're a writer and you haven't found an editor you trust then you have a moral imperative to find one. After ten years of working together, I know I can trust her not to lead me astray. (She is for hire, if you're in need.)

I got my edits back a couple of days ago, had a meeting with her (on our yoga mats, it was beautiful) and hashed out the big things that need to be tackled. I came away knowing that while I am not writing a new story this November I'll be completely re-writing my current one. I may as well use the website tools to track my progress and milestones and keep me on track and motivated for the entire month. Does it make me any less of a NaNo'er that I am writing 50K works of a story I've already hashed out? It might, but I don't care. I will donate to cover the costs of my usage and my conscience will rest easy about my little white lie.

Holy shit, I have 11 days to prepare! And lots of questions still unanswered. Better get brainstorming... If you need me I'll be re-visioning. Otherwise known as re-writing. There's still time to join me and all the other November novelists at www.nanowrimo.org

Why I'm NOT doing NaNoWriMo this year

It's October. Weeks away from my historically statistical most productive writing month of the entire year. My email is hopping with updates from National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) getting me geared up and ready. My creative juices are already brewing and I'm on a roll with new material waiting to spew forth...I'm like an addict in need of intervention!

Hi, I'm Terra and I'm addicted to NaNoWriMo and writing first drafts.

It's been a very fruitful year for me in the writing department. And my writing group already intervened months ago forcing a commitment from me to revise one of my first drafts between now and February. I told them I would be ready to pitch to agents and publishers by then to see if I can get someone to buy one and publish it. So, I won't be using November to write a shiny new novel - a skill I've mastered after having done it so many times already. Instead, I'll be revising. A piece of the craft I have yet to master as well as the first draft. Probably a better use of my time in the grand scheme of things.

After LTUE last year I committed to writing short stories to figure out how to revise on a much smaller scale. I did it - with a story I'm super proud of but which is on draft number seven - seven - in preparation for publication. (Yes, I might have some very exciting news coming soon!) If it takes seven drafts of a novel to get it ready, I've got a lot of work ahead of me. Guess I better get to it! If you need me, I'll be writing - I mean editing!

NaNoWriMo 2013 Recap

Is it me or is this getting easier?

I've done National Novel Writing Month six times now - not including the failed Camp NaNo attempt this past summer that never really got off the ground. This was my third year winning and the first time I not only finished the 50K word count but also finished the rough draft of the novel I had started. It was also the easiest attempt in my memory. I have a theory about why...

Is it because I had already completed a rough draft of my first novel and know how to get to "The End"?

Is it because I have used all these years to build a habit for daily writing - at least during November?

Is it because I planned ahead this time with character studies and a plot outline before November hit?

I think it has a lot to do with all three of these key elements.

This November was not the perfect month to pick to impose this crazy deadline on myself and life threw even more wrenches into the works. I was too tired on Halloween to stay up past midnight and write a couple thousand words to start off with a buffer like I always have before. Little Sister (who is now three) came down with a nasty flu at the end of week two and I had to hold her while she suffered with high fevers for a solid week. The only time I could write was while she was drugged and sleeping. Then one night of planned house guests a couple of days before Thanksgiving turned into three days and I could only write after everyone had gone to bed - much later than a normal night.

With all of that plus the craziness that always comes with my life anyway, I still managed to write every day except three over the course of the entire month. And I hit the daily word count goal an average of four days every week. I caught up little by little on the nights I wrote well and spent the weekends holed up with my laptop while my family tried to manage itself without me at the helm. Big Sister did her own laundry to help out a couple of times, and my amazingly supportive Hubby did dishes and grocery shopping all month and even cooked huge meals on the weekends when there was more time so we could eat reheated leftovers during the week. As a result, I only stayed up past midnight once the entire month - very unlike any of my previous winning attempts. And, I was DONE EARLY and enjoyed a celebratory date night on November 30th which was super strange. Usually I'm frantically clawing for word count to validate my novel with minutes to spare in the wee hours before the 30th comes to a close.

So how did I really do it?

1. I spent all of October fleshing out characters and plot points so all I really had to do in November was write the story I'd already thought through. Of course I got halfway through and realized the plot was far too elaborate and my characters had gone and gotten us pretty far off course so I had to rethink the ending but that wasn't as hard as I imagined.
2. I invested in software especially designed for writers that made managing my plot a breeze. (If you haven't checked out Scrivener, do yourself a favor and do. It is super affordable and once you start using it you are hooked.) This allowed me the flexibility to write those scenes I'd planned to happen in the order I was inspired to write them rather than how I planned to lay them out. Keeping the creativity juices flowing made the actual writing so much more effortless.
3. My family and all my friends were on board and supportive of my efforts. This is huge and I can't stress enough how important it is. Writing is like having a job and if you want people to take you seriously you have to treat it as such. My family knew that I had scheduled the time after the kids went to bed at 9:00 until midnight every night to devote to writing and then large chunks of each weekend as well. Friends supported me from afar and didn't extend invitations they knew would tempt me from my writing.
4. I didn't deprive myself entirely of those things in life that keep me grounded and happy. All three of the days that I didn't write were nights that I used wisely. One night I spent with Hubby; one was an impromptu night of laughter, tears and wine with a friend that went further in recharging my batteries than I might have imagined before I spontaneously threw caution to the wind on a whim; and I didn't write on Thanksgiving. I still did yoga three to four days a week. And I still went to my monthly book club. I could do these things because they helped me stay focused on maintaining the daily word count when I was writing so I could slow and steady win the race.
5. I wrote every day (with the noted exceptions above) whether I was inspired to do so when I sat down or not. This made it so I didn't ever get so far behind that I had to do massive feats of will (or caffeine) to write enough to catch up. Remember the last time I won when I wrote something like 18K in the last five days? That was insane and I swore I would never do it again. Instead, I never got more than about 3K behind the 1667 words a day pace and was able to keep the goal easily within sight. It seems like the simplest and silliest writing advice anyone ever gives when they say "Just write" but that has boiled down to the key for me.

This year was noteworthy because all four of us in my amazing writer's group finally did NaNoWriMo together. Most of us have attempted it at some point or another over the past six years but this was the first year that all four of us planned ahead and were poised to participate at the same time. It was amazing to have each other for support and everyone agreed - win or lose - that we learned something AND wrote more than we would have if we didn't participate. Everything is better with friends to lighten the load and ease the pain, to share the excitement and the milestones, and to lament the frustrations that come with any worthwhile endeavor.

I'm taking the month of December off to celebrate the holidays and reconnect with my family. And come January I will again embark into uncharted territory when I begin the process of editing my rough draft from the messy, grammatically incorrect, tense-switching, inconsistent and full of plot holes state it currently is into something worthy of submitting to agents and publishers. It is sure to be a wild ride!

I did it... again!

There is a pattern emerging... I do NaNoWriMo every year but I only win every other year. This time I finished six hours before the deadline (a first). I ended up on a date with Hubby that night feeling guilty that I was out in the world enjoying myself when it was still November (gasp!). I'm taking the weekend off from writing... a rest I fully deserve. Then I'll recap for your reading pleasure, as always!

A Day in the NaNo Life

It struck me this week how life throws so many curve balls especially in November. I appreciate the challenge that this seemingly insane deadline offers in and of itself and how it is designed to take my "someday I'll be a writer" dream one step closer to reality with solid work habits when it comes to writing. Because that's really what doing NaNoWriMo is about for me. But what if your life is completely insane already and then you try to add something like writing an entire novel in a single month onto your plate? You get a day like what I had yesterday which I will now recap for your reading pleasure...

12:30 am - hit the sack for some shut eye after falling asleep over my keyboard and throwing in the towel for the night.

12:30 - 5:30 am - slept like a baby. (Don't hate me that I fall asleep the second before my head hits the pillow every time.)

5:30 - 5:45 am - claw myself awake, chat with hubby while snoozing my alarm clock

5:45 - 6:00 am - scramble out of bed in a panic, throw on clothes, brush teeth and head for yoga

6:00 - 7:15 am - yoga

7:15 - 9:30 am - get kids up and moving, shower, herd cats kids toward morning routine completion, get both off to school/dropped off at daycare

9:30 am - 2:15 pm - work the day job from my home office. Grabbed lunch on the go between phone calls and ate at my desk.

2:15 - 3:10 pm - parent/teacher conference with Big Sister with a side of book fair to suck more time I don't have from my day. But she wants to read so how can I not?

3:10 - 3:30 pm - more cat herding to get Big Sister ready for dance and dropped off while Hubby picks up Little Sister from daycare

3:30 - 5:30 pm - work the day job

5:30 - 8:00 pm - family dinner to celebrate my Mom's birthday. Tried to enjoy family togetherness without stressing about how far behind in my word count I already am and how I can't afford to be there having fun.

8:00 - 9:00 pm - bedtime cat herding routine and kids tucked into bed

9:00 - 9:30 pm - coffee brewing and Facebook and chasing Little Sister back to bed

9:30 pm - 12:00 am - dedicated writing time which I also filled with unnecessary Facebook browsing because the writing isn't flowing and hey, look, someone commented on my post! (Admitting you have a problem is the first step, right?) An hour in I cut off my connection to the internet and tried not to obsessively need to update my word count online after every paragraph...

12:00 - 12:30 am - compose blog because it is all fresh on my mind, I don't want to try and capture this later plus the two cups of coffee I consumed during my writing block just kicked in and I'm not tired now. In fact, I'm kind of giddy and I need to do something or I'll post ridiculous (and giddy) Facebook status posts that no one else will think are as funny as I do because I am beyond looney at this point of the night and wired on caffeine and sugar. WHEE!

12:30 - 12:45 am - hit the sack, because even though I probably could stay awake and catch up the fifteen hundred words I'm behind, if I don't get some sleep there's no way I can function tomorrow at work.

There you have it - a day in the life of my November this year. Part of me wonders if I really have it more crazy than other people or if I just like to think of myself as different than most. I also found myself thinking about how if this "someday I'll be a writer" dream were to come true, there will certainly be a time where I could be a published author but not making enough money to quit my day job. In which case, this is what my life every single day would look like - only hopefully less addicted to Facebook. In moments of weakness, part of me wonders if I really have it in me for more than a month... but I keep writing anyway!

T-Minus Ten Days

It is almost November. That busy month where most people are gearing up for mainstream things like Thanksgiving and Christmas shopping and crazy writers like me are attempting what initially seems like the impossible: to participate and hopefully win National Novel Writing Month on top of all the things everyone else is doing. If you're new to the blog you may not understand the massive undertaking I challenge myself with every year for the past six. Writing fifty thousand words in the thirty days of November. Last year there were over three hundred thousand others globally who joined this challenge with me and I've heard this year is going to be even bigger.

I've been plotting and character developing since mid-September in preparation for writing the first draft of my next novel starting at midnight on Halloween. Have I got everything figured out yet? Nope. Am I worried? Nope. Am I secretly rejoicing that my health has improved so much that I feel almost one hundred percent like my old self so I can realistically imagine pulling late nights night after night and consuming massive amounts of coffee to keep me awake the next day so I have a chance in hell of winning this year? You bet your ass!

Have you thought of writing a novel but never did anything about actually doing it? NaNoWriMo is the coolest and best writing event to develop personal habits that easily translate to the rest of the year. No matter what the rest of the year looks like for me, I always know I'll be a writer who writes every day during November. And usually that habit persists well into the rest of the year. I haven't "won" every year but I write more every November than I would without this silly contest/challenge and that is all that really counts.

For more information and to join the party for free check out www.nanowrimo.org and register to join me! There is a real-life side to the online contest too if you want to meet other local writers at the kick-off parties or participate in write-ins in your area. My favorite part of registering is getting access to the word count statistics where I can obsessively and continuously update my word count and see the very real and uber-cool progress I'm making every day.

The NaNo that wasn't

It's happened before... getting to the end of November and not winning NaNoWriMo. But this time was different. I had prepared for this one far more than any before. I had a fully-plotted story - albeit rough and very high level - with characters and motivations and all the things that I didn't have the times before when I didn't win.  Yet I still stalled at just over twelve thousand words.

Yes, I know... twelve thousand words is more than some people write in an entire month - myself included some months.  But my goal was fifty thousand and it was attainable.  I was even ahead of the word count after the first weekend.

So what happened?

Well, there was that pesky pulmonary embolism I was diagnosed with on November 1st.  But in reality I could have labeled that any of a number of things.  And all those things can be lumped together and called "life".  The lesson I'm taking away from this month of best laid plans, derailed by no control of my own, is that life happens.  You can either let it get you down or you can look at the bright side and take away whatever good there is to take from the situation.  My health had to come first this year; and while I don't have a purple winners bar at the end of the month, I still worked every time I had the energy to do so.

One of the biggest unspoken fears I've been grappling with as I sprint *cough* crawl to the finish line of the first draft of my first novel is WHAT'S NEXT?  What if I can't come up with another good idea.  What if I spent five years figuring out how to write a novel, finally finish one and then that's it.  I'll never have another idea.

I didn't need to worry, though.  While I didn't have the energy or the time to write amid all the craziness of my life during November, I did have ideas brewing.  And now I'm pushing myself to finish this monumental, FIRST novel so I can get to the TWO other stories I've got to write now.  Hello, I'm Terra and I'm a writer regardless of whether I won or lost this year's NaNoWriMo.

What is it about November?

Why is it that when the air turns crisp and the nights get longer I suddenly find new energy for writing?  Its like just the thought of November and it's designation as National Novel Writing Month looming in the coming weeks magically motivates me.

I've been in the "percolating" stage for months on my novel.  Which is writer speak for I'm-not-actually-doing-any-writing-but-I'm-thinking-alot-about-writing.  I used to fight this time when it would hit me but I've learned that if I wait it out and allow the percolation I am surprised at what my subconscious spews out when it's over.  This time was no exception.

Remember that the last writing I did was on my camping trip when I got reacquainted with where I'd left the story and all the characters and then banged out a new chapter.  Fast forward to yesterday when I sat down and without much thought produced a pretty killer chapter to fill a hole in the middle that until then had a one sentence of "this should happen here" as a placeholder.  Once that hole was filled in, the flood gates opened wide.

Tonight I spent my allotted writing time NOT on Facebook (miracle) and read the entire manuscript putting one sentence synopsis with each chapter heading.  (I just upgraded to Word 2010 and I'm really digging the default navigation bar on the left that shows you the headings in list form.)  Now I can see the flow of what every chapter accomplishes - as well as the few remaining holes that have yet to be written.  HOLY. SHIT.  I've only got 4 chapters to write and I'm done with my first draft!!

Surely I can write 4 chapters in the next three weeks.  Because then it will be November and I can start on the other thing the most recent percolating has conjured: a new story idea.  Yes, you read this post correctly.  I procrastinated percolated finishing the rough draft of my first novel so long that now I only have three weeks to finish it AND plan a new story so I can do National Novel Writing Month again this year.  Talk about working better under pressure and setting high expectations of yourself, eh?

Here's to burning the midnight oil and drinking more coffee than I have all year so I can basically write at breakneck speed for TWO months instead of one.  And may I live to tell about it when it's all over.

How I survived (and won) NaNoWriMo 2011

Remember when I was heading into this mammoth undertaking and I said I was scared because this time around it felt different?  Well, almost everything about this year was different.

This was my fourth "NaNo" (as people in the know call it) and my second win.  But, I had several epiphanies this time around which will be the difference in getting the first step of this multi-year project finally finished.  It is the hardest step I believe:  Finish your manuscript.  A first draft must exist in order to edit and polish and make pretty enough to convince a publisher to take a chance on your book.  It's something that no matter how many times I've started I haven't figured out how to do.  Before now.

No, I'm not finished, don't get all a twitter just yet!

But I am still writing in December which has never happened before.  Even the first time I won I digressed into word padding shenanigans and let my characters do whatever they wanted to regardless of where I wanted the story to go or what I thought their motivations should be.  In all honesty, it was long ago and I don't even think I realized they NEEDED motivations yet.  That year all I wanted was the sheer volume of 50K to say I'd won.  And December first came and I abandoned the entire thing.  That year I never even got out of the beginning, let alone the dreaded middle.

This year I treated NaNo like I had a second job.  Everyone in my life knew that my writing was happening at a specific scheduled time (9:00-11:00PM) and let me do it without interruption during that time.  If I'm ever going to be a published author without quitting my day job that's the way it's going to have to be.  And guess what - when I started living like I already have what I want, it was easy to do what I needed to do to make it happen.  Epiphany #1: writing every day is possible regardless of what you have going on in your life. It's just like anything else - if it's important enough you'll find the time to do it.

Writer's block aside, which I dealt with the second week and already wrote about, I stuck to marching my characters down the road I had mapped out for all of them in my plot structure/outline.  This got me through the middle before I even realized it.  Epiphany #2: it doesn't matter what advice other authors tell you, the only way to be successful is to figure out what works for you personally.  I thought I was a discovery writer because my favorite author said that's how he writes.  So I spent a couple of years forcing myself to be that, without the success I thought was inevitable.  Then I continued to learn and grow as a writer and explored other possible ways of doing things. I morphed several things that struck me as interesting to work for my own personal style and in the end found my own unique method.

One of the benefits of being an official, registered participant in this event is getting weekly pep talks from published authors who have been where you are every step of the way.  I got one that hit home as we headed into the final stretch.  Basically it said that 50K was not ever going to be a completed novel but the important thing was to finish the story and be able to write "The End" by the time you got there.  To do this, you pick key scenes you already know are going to happen and you don't care about tying them cohesively together, you just write each of them until you get the basic story down.  Then, you go back and fill in the parts between them that have to get the characters from each big scene cohesively.  Ephiphany #3: a rough draft is never going to be anything but a diamond in the rough so don't get bogged down in getting every single thing perfect.  Just write - and ask questions later.  Without this little gem, I would have gotten bogged down in not knowing every single little detail of what happens in the story leading up to the finale and gotten stalled out.  Instead, I wrote the scenes I knew and had already pictured in my head.  And I found out that, by doing so, many of the details of how to get the characters there were answered after they arrived.  And on at least one occasion, I found relationships had changed on the way to that point which will make going back and filling in the blanks that much better.

One of the things I wish I could have changed was not getting so far behind.  I wrote eighteen thousand of my fifty thousand in the last five days.  FIVE. DAYS.  I don't recommend this to anyone - especially if you have a full time job!  I was up until three in the morning for several consecutive nights trying to work and stay awake to do it all over the next day.  I wrote during my lunch hour at work and for the hour I would normally have gone to the gym in the afternoons.  I lived on coffee - pots and pots of it all day and all night - and food that was not good for me.  The worst part is I was so exhausted that even if I had time to work out, I didn't have the energy to do it.  I'm still afraid to step on the scale and see how much damage has been done, I'm already feeling the effects of the caffeine withdrawals, and I'm pretty sure in my delirious state on November thirtieth I said things in a staff meeting that were wildly inappropriate.

I did take an hour the second to last evening to attend an event at a friend's house.  It was exactly what I needed - to see the majority of my writer's group who cheered me on and were as excited about me being out of the middle as I was.  They gave me that extra boost of encouragement I needed to see me through the last INSANE twenty four hours.  If you ever decide to do this yourself, make sure you tell everyone and then shout it out to Facebook and Twitter for good measure.  All the people in your life cheering you on makes those bleak and dark hours when you don't think you have it in you to continue never more than fleeting in the grand scheme of things.

All that aside, I survived - and I'm still writing - and when I look back I hope this proves to be the year that all the pieces finally fell into place.  Someone said that NaNo (or any rough draft) is like filling the room with straw that later you use to spin into gold.  I think of it more like all the hard work of finding and digging up a big, ugly chunk of rock.  When you're done, you're left with something that hopefully you can polish and cut into a beautiful gem.  To all of you who stuck with me and cheered me on and said you knew I could do it: Thank you, I couldn't have done it without you!

Your latest NaNoWriMo WINNER!

I DID IT!!!

With thirty minutes to spare - and 50,205 words at time of validation!

Now I need to sleep.  For a week.

And then finish the story which isn't done no matter how many words I busted ass to pull out in the last month. This first rough draft demands to be finished.

Stay tuned, you know I'll tell you all about it...

The home stretch stress

Five days left of November and I've written 32,783 words since the beginning of the month.  I should have ten thousand more than that but I got derailed this past week with the holiday and family responsibilities after I had gotten caught up from my first sidebar into the weeds.  I've got characters who have taken me places I hadn't thought of, characters who I've had to re-invent to work better with the world and story I'm building as things develop.  Despite all of that, I'm pushing hard for the end.  I have five days left and at this rate I have to write more than three thousand words every day in order to win NaNoWriMo.  I haven't given up yet - I wrote two thousand words between the end of a family party last night and going to bed this morning after two AM.  And I still have two more days of a long weekend to do some major catch up.  I'm not going to lie, I get anxious about my chances of winning when I look at the daily numbers.  But I'm still on track and  still have the basic idea of how things are going thanks to my fabulous plot structure and I've still got great momentum.  I have not yet resorted to word-padding shenanigans (which I have done in years past).  As long as I can find the energy and drink enough coffee to stay awake long enough every night to hit that target word count I'll be golden.  Ready or not, here comes one of the craziest week of my life!

New beginnings in unexpected places

Here we are in week three of NaNoWriMo.  And what a wild ride it has been.  I thought a couple of times that I might be sort of cheating this year since I've *technically* been working on the same novel I originally started with back in 2008.  But I used the following rational to counter that:

1. I had scrapped every piece of shitty writing I'd done to date and had no plans to even look back at any of it for reference.  (yes, it was that shitty!)
   
2. I had plotted out a structure for the entire story complete with several subplots all neatly tied in with each other
3. I had even changed the main character's name since we named Baby Sister the original character name when she was born

With the new plot and new character motivations I knew the book would be far different than I had envisioned when I first came up with the idea.  But guess what?  I never needed to rationalize a single little thing!

I had a rough start after I got through the prologue (which hasn't really changed much over each iteration of attempts).  I wrote myself into a corner where I knew my character would never be stupid enough to do what I was trying to make her do as a means to get her physically from one place to another.  I wasted days of writing more crap dragging one scene out and never getting anywhere but behind in my target word count. I was honestly getting worried.  What if I hadn't prepared enough?  What if I couldn't figure out how to translate a plot to a real story?  What if I failed?

Then I went for a run.

And I had the best run of my life - five miles in a hour which is insanely fast for me!

I must have shook up my brain with all that pounding of treadmill because I came off that run with a shit-eating grin glued to my face AND a way to get myself out of the corner and fix everything!

I rushed home and wrote like a mad woman.  I was able to salvage most of that original crappy chapter and after adding seven hundred or so words I was back on track toward where I needed to be heading.  I was even on my way to the next mile-marker plot point.

And I know I was still high from that amazing run when the next morning in the shower I had the one piece of unknown I'd been trying to solve SINCE THE BEGINNING IN 2008 just fall into place.  It was so earth-shattering when it happened I expected to feel the earth move beneath me.  But it didn't.  One minute I had this question of "how does that happen that will make sense and be believable" playing over and over in my subconscious.  And the next it was clear as day how it would all work.  The last loose end was no longer loose!  Plus, it was so fundamental that it changed everything.  Including the title which had been the one constant from the beginning.

I wonder if anyone else who embarked on this journey is experiencing anything similar.  Because it is crazy how unbelievable it all is and I'm only half done!

Easy-peasy... that's what SHE said!

We are officially nine days into November and when I finally went to bed last night, I felt amazing. I pushed past head-nodding and what I know is crappy-writing-that-will-have-to-be-edited-like-crazy to hit the ten thousand word mark for this year's NaNoWriMo. Well on my way to that fifty thousand needed to get me a winner status by the end of the month. Sounds great, right? Except the little stats page on the official site is telling me that "at this rate" I'll finish well into December because to date I have *only* been averaging 1,121 words a day.  So much for that buffer I started with when I stayed up on Halloween to write for two hours when it officially became November, huh?

But guess what?  I DON'T CARE!

This year's progress tracker on the NaNo website - which for those of you contemplating participating at a later date makes registering as a participant worth it alone - is much better than in years past. I say this because I am a numbers girl.  I need the data at my fingertips, calculated for me, so I don't obsess and waste valuable writing time assessing for myself just how much writing I have done or have left to do. As in years past, it tells you what your target word count for each day is if you write slow and steady and do the recommended 1,667 words a day.  But this year it tells you what you personally average every day and how many words a day you personally need to do at any point in order to finish on time.  Whoever thought of this improvement should be kissed.  Sloppy and loud -- on the mouth -- with tongue!

Here's why.  November fifth is my wedding anniversary.  I take that entire day off from writing every year. But this is well enough into the month - almost a week - that we are already into some serious numbers on the daily word count targets.  Those daily 1,667 words add up quickly, kids!  The target for the fifth day is 8,333, but instead I stagnate an entire day at only 6,666.  Then when I go back to it on the sixth day and my word count target for the day is 10,000... well, you can imagine the stress and head games that go along with those two numbers and how far apart they are.  The pressure imposed on catching up such a deficit, I admit, completely derailed me the first year I attempted this crazy adventure.  But I don't have the option of not celebrating my anniversary!  Hubby is super supportive of my writing but even he would have issue with that...

Fast forward to this year when the same thing happened.  PLUS, I had to work last Sunday when I would normally have had plenty of time sitting in front of a football game on TV to catch up on my word count.  AND I've been unable to push myself to stay up super late this week without falling asleep on my keyboard.  Or worse, writing incoherent crap that I have to delete the next day.  Which results in my only having 10,092 words out of yesterday's target of 13,333.  

But guess what!  My super duper nifty stats page tells me that all I have to do is write 1,814 words every day from now on to make up the difference and still finish on time.  That's only an extra 147 words per day from the original daily target or only about 700 more words a day than I have already been averaging this month.  And totally doable when presented in this fashion.

BRILLIANT!!

My stress level for NaNoWriMo this year is more manageable all because of someone somewhere (who probably doesn't get paid for helping on this non-profit adventure) who is a numbers person like me.  Wherever that person is, whoever she or he is, I hope someday they stumble upon this blog and know just how much I appreciate this one stroke of genius.

If there is one piece of writing advice that I have found to be universally true no matter who asks it, it is this:  Write.  And write every day.  I'm at ten thousand plus words in a week just by carving out two hours a day, every day except my anniversary.  If I can do it with a full time job and hectic home life when the only time I have to devote to writing is the time I'm awake after my kids go to bed, then anyone can!

Gearing up for NaNoWriMo - take four

It's almost November and, like many writers, that means I'm gearing up to embark on National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo).  This will be my fourth attempt to write 50,000 words - FIFTY. THOUSAND. WORDS - between November 1st and 30th.  Nothing else in my life is slacking during this month.  I don't get to take a sabbatical from work or being a Mom or being a wife.  I just have to add this gargantuan task into the already crazy mix.  I know it can be done - I "won" the year I was pregnant with baby sister after all.  Although I could argue that life was way less crazy back then with only an eight year old in the house to care for.

In anticipation of the event, my writer's group met this week and I laid out my rough ideas and got tons of great feedback, as always.  We discussed things I need to remember to think about.  Hard questions were asked, ones I hope I have answers for stewing around in the soup of my subconscious where this story's been brewing. Brainstorming for things that could happen to make the story different and unique that I'd never considered were thrown around.  I don't know what I'd do without those three women...

This NaNo feels different.  I've got a plot structure and my version of character studies that double as story lines that feel much like a plot.  ME!  A PLOT!  I've sharpened my tools and laid them neatly in my writer's toolbox.  And I've committed to both myself and my writer's group that once I start writing come November I'm not stopping until I've got a completed first draft.  Time to step up, grow a vagina and put my money where my mouth is about this writing stuff.  Which I'm sure is why things feel different this time.  It's the anticipation of knowing that something big might be happening... and hoping you don't fuck it all up.